The Importance of Compatibility Over Chemistry in Building Stable Relationships

In the world of dating and relationships, we often hear about the importance of chemistry – that spark, that instant connection that draws two people together. Chemistry is undeniably important and can create a strong initial attraction between individuals. However, as time goes on and relationships evolve, it becomes increasingly clear that compatibility is what truly sustains a partnership in the long run.

Chemistry may be what initially brings two people together, but compatibility is what keeps them together. Compatibility refers to the alignment of values, beliefs, goals, and lifestyles between partners. When two individuals are compatible, they are more likely to have a deeper understanding of each other, communicate effectively, and navigate challenges together.

One of the key reasons why compatibility is more important than chemistry in building stable relationships is that compatibility lays the foundation for a strong and lasting connection. While chemistry can create excitement and passion in the beginning, it is compatibility that ensures that a relationship can withstand the test of time. When partners are compatible, they are more likely to share similar life goals and visions for the future, which can help them navigate life’s ups and downs together.

Moreover, compatibility fosters a sense of harmony and understanding between partners. When two people are on the same page in terms of their values and beliefs, they are more likely to respect each other’s perspectives and support each other in achieving their goals. This mutual understanding and support are essential for building trust and security in a relationship, which are crucial for its stability.

While chemistry sparks when two people get attracted by the positive qualities of each other, compatibility means accepting and acknowledging each other’s differences and their weaknesses. It is always easy to live with the positive traits but it is rather difficult to stay in a relationship with the shortcomings or negative traits that people have. Always remember that nobody is perfect and in order to have a long-lasting relationship, one has to accept the other partner with their flaws since that is what forms the complete package.

In contrast, relying solely on chemistry without considering compatibility can lead to challenges down the road. While chemistry can create an initial attraction, it may not be enough to sustain a relationship in the long term if partners are not compatible in other areas of their lives. Without compatibility, partners may find themselves constantly clashing over fundamental issues, leading to misunderstandings, conflicts, and ultimately, the breakdown of the relationship.

Ultimately, while chemistry is important in sparking a romantic connection, it is compatibility that forms the solid foundation for a stable and fulfilling relationship. Finding a partner who acknowledges and accepts you the way you are without trying to change you can lead to a deeper and more meaningful connection that stands the test of time. So, the next time you’re looking for love, remember that compatibility is key to building a lasting and stable relationship.

Photo by Ryan Franco on Unsplash

Activities for Making Kids Maths Friendly

Maths is an interesting subject, however, it is often perceived as difficult or tough by most of us. This perception of ours often gets ingrained among the children which later gets converted in maths phobia.

To get rid of this phobia or to make sure that kids do not develop it, I always made sure to make my kids number friendly right from the very beginning. It is not about making kids study maths or drilling them with maths exercises instead it is about involving and creating activities with numbers so that kids develop an interest in them.

Maths in Nature

Maths is everywhere around us. We often fail to notice or observe it. Recently, while helping my daughter in her school projects, I came across this very interesting topic of Maths in Nature. It’s a great way of letting kids know how maths is present in nature and is an essential part of it. For older kids, let them observe and notice the patterns and symmetry in leaves, flowers, trees and animals.

For younger kids, take them for a nature walk and let them observe the lines, shapes and sizes of different leaves and flowers. Let them compare their colours, textures, sizes.

Maths in Real Life

Let the kids explore the various aspects of Maths in everyday life. While walking on the road, we can point out the pattern of the zebra crossing. The comparison in the size of different vehicles, the shapes of various buildings. Older kids can be asked to observe 3 D shapes in various buildings. They can be shown the pictures of different structures like pyramids, tombs, rectangular buildings and so on.

Fun Games with Maths

Remember, hopscotch? We could play this fun game based on numbers for hours at a stretch. This game is based on numbers, forward counting, backward and skip counting. How about taking this game a little forward and writing multiplication tables in each block? Children will have fun learning tables and never forget them.

Maths Based Board Games

Games like Snakes and ladder, monopoly, Business, Ludo and various card games like UNO, playing cards and even Tambola help kids develop an interest in numbers from the very beginning. If parents get involved while playing such games with their children, they will find numbers fun.

There are a number of other activities which I did with my daughters to make them number friendly. Once, the child develops an inclination towards numbers, they will always find it easy while learning in their later life in school.

Feasting While Fasting: Best Places to Enjoy Navratra Thalis in Delhi

Navratri is the time when special Navratri thalis are served in some of the restaurants of Delhi. The Navratri thalis contain special dishes that can be eaten during the fasts of Navratras.

The restaurants which serve Navratra thalis do not use onions, garlic and everyday cereal in this “vrat ka khana”. These dishes are prepared using desi ghee and pure salt instead of ordinary refined oil and commonly used table salt.

Here are the five best restaurants which serve these special navratri thalis:

1.    Veg Gulati

Veg Gulati is famous for its North Indian cuisine. It sees a huge rush and waiting outside is a normal practice but the food served is worth every second spent in waiting outside.

A bit on the expensive side but the food is sure to appeal your taste buds.

Where is it located: Shop No.8, Pandara Road Market, New Delhi- 110003.

 

2.    Sagar Ratna

Sagar Ratna is a chain of South Indian restaurants in various parts of Delhi. Their Navratri thali contains dishes like sabudana khichdi, singhade ke pakode, sabudana wada, sitafal, kuttu ki puri to name a few.

Where is it located: Multiple locations in Delhi- Defence Colony, Paschim Vihar, Pusa Road, Chanakya Puri

 

3.    Haldiram

The navratri thali at Haldiram is sure to pamper your taste buds. They serve a huge variety of dishes in special thali like vrat ke chawal, sukhi arbi, paneer tomato, kuttu ki puri, soma rice and shrikhand to name a few.

Where is it located: Multiple locations in Delhi- Naraina, Connaught Place, Janak Puri, Gurgaon.

4.    Sattvik

Sattvik is a luxury dining place for vegetarians. It serves North Indian Vegetable food. The ambience is pure and quiet and it serves extremely delicious vrat ka khana during Navratras.

Where is it located: S-5, 2^nd Floor, Select City Walk Mall, Saket, New Delhi

5.    Govinda’s

Govinda’s is located inside the premises of Iskcon temple. It is a pure vegetarian restaurant which serves its meals to Lord Krishna first. Special Navratri thalis are prepared with love and devotion here during the festive season.

Where is it located: Ground Floor, Iskcon Temple complex, Raja Dirsain Marg, Hari Krishna Hill, East of Kailash, New Delhi.

 

 

Finding Freedom from Those Perpetual Mommy Guilt

It has been twelve years of my motherhood or should I say twelve years of suffering of that perpetual mommy guilt.

The questions like “what I am doing wrong?” starts from the first day of becoming a mother.

“The baby didn’t poop today”.

“Did I feed her well?”

“The baby is falling sick now and then.”

“Is it because I neglected her for going to work?”

“My child did not secure good marks in her exams?”

“Maybe I need to spend more time with her.”

Those pricking questions have been going on in my mind, haunting me, giving me sleepless nights for the past twelve years.

 When I look at my kids, these twelve years seems to have passed in a wink; but inside my mind, I have spent these years in imprisonment.

The country is celebrating its Independence but can a mother ever set herself free?

Can she ever spend a few hours by herself without feeling guilty of neglecting her children?

This year, I want to set myself free. Free from those troubling thoughts! Free from those sleepless nights! For once, I want to be free!

How much I wish to get a pat on my back for the upbringing of my children? For once, I would like to hear a few words of someone telling me, “Wow! Your kids are doing so well in everything only because of your efforts.”

Why should anyone else be saying that to me? Why can’t I tell it to myself? Does anyone know better than me how much I have been toiling for the sake of kids? How many times have I put back my wishes and happiness to be by their side? Why can’t it be me who would appreciate me for the efforts that I have been putting for the health and happiness of my children? 

While celebrating the Independence of my motherland this year, I want to celebrate the mother inside me; for she has also toiled hard for the sake of her kids.

I choose to stand by myself, supporting and encouraging me for the nights I have spent lying awake only to make sure that my kids are sleeping well.

This year I am setting myself free from that constant state of guilt which had caged me for so long. I am going to feel good for each and everything that I have done for my children. To every mother like me out there, I would like to give a pat on their back. Let me tell you, whatever you are doing for your kids, is the best.

Do you feel this mommy guilt too? How do you deal with this guilt? Share your views with me in comments.

Home hacks I swear by every monsoon

Monsoon is a beautiful season. It is poetic, romantic, dreamy and just lovely. However, it monsoon also means dampness, moisture, mud, and leaks. Muddy footprints in the house is an unavoidable issue. It also brings with it a lot of infections and mosquitoes. That’s why It becomes essential to take care of health, hygiene, and sanitation in and around the house.

Here are some tips which I follow every year to make my house ready before monsoons in order to prevent mosquitoes and diseases.

1. Timely repair of taps and pipes

I keep a check on all the pipes and get them repaired in time to avoid any water seepage or water accumulation at any place around the house. Also, the place where water purifiers are installed generally remains damp and moist. It is a must to keep it dry and clean during this season.

2. Dark areas

It becomes a must before the onset of monsoons to spot all the dark areas of the house and get them cleaned regularly. Areas that are underneath the sink especially become a breeding ground for mosquitoes and germs during this season. Every night I clean these places and spray mosquito repellents or a disinfectant liquid in this place.

3. Sewage

It is extremely important to de-clog the sewages regularly. Even if the sewage is not clogged, I put de-clog and drain cleaning powders regularly during monsoons. It prevents mosquitoes and cockroaches from entering the house.

4. Declutter is a must

It is very important to declutter and organise the house especially kitchen before monsoons. The unused items lying around the house often clutter the house and become the breeding ground of mosquitoes and spread infections.

Also, organise the house and kitchen in such a way that every member should be able to access the things easily.

5. Care for the closets

It is useful to put some neem leaves or cloves in the between the clothes in the cupboards to keep the silverfish at bay and keep them fresh.

6. Roll away those carpets

If you have carpets in the house, it is better to roll them away during monsoons. It is a very common sight to have wet feet and shoes in the house, carpets become damp with wet feet and do not dry easily during this season. It becomes difficult to maintain hygiene with carpets around during rains as they can house germs.

7. Keep an antiseptic liquid handy

It is important to keep hygiene essentials like antiseptic liquid and a liquid handwash at an easily accessible place and ensure that everyone uses it at least once after coming from outside and especially after getting caught in the rains. Cuts and bruises are not uncommon, so for that, I keep a bottle of antiseptic liquid handy since the chances of infections are very high in this season.

8. Checking the doors and windows

It is always better to keep the doors and windows tightly shut and see that the rainwater does not come inside from beneath the doors. For this, one can get a rubber strip fixed at the bottom of the door which would keep rainwater away.

9. Change and wash upholstery

I wash the curtains with Antiseptic liquid before the monsoons because these catch a lot of dust and do not dry easily during the rainy season. It is advisable to either change them and opt for light colours and wash them before the onset of monsoons to keep a check on mosquitoes.

10. Throw away unwanted shoes

Shoes if lying unused for some time, start catching fungus due to dampness. It is better to get rid of them before monsoons and clean and wash those which are being used regularly. Also, whenever possible keep them under the sun to ensure there is no moisture in them.

11. Regular cleaning of dustbins

It is always better to change the dustbins or clean and dry them properly. Also, if possible to use dustbin bags for proper disposal of garbage.

12. Door knobs and handles

I remember when my father was discharged from hospital last year, doctors especially advised us to clean the switchboards, door knobs and handles with a good surface cleaner like Dettol. These are touched by everybody especially the maids and have a lot of germs in them. To avoid the spread of germs in the house, it is important to clean them every day.

I follow these tips to take care of the health and hygiene for my family. Let me know your tips and hacks for monsoons too in the comment box.

 This post is also published on Momspresso – https://www.momspresso.com/parenting/my-kids-my-wings/article/home-hacks-i-swear-by-every-monsoon

#BAR-A-THON 2018 Day 1 :One too many

“Nandita, you just have to do it once. Look at the amount he is paying. You’ll be able to buy the dress you want for Aman’s party.” Nandita gave into Renuka’s suggestion.

That ‘one time’ was followed by many for she wanted the lifestyle of her friends.

The first time she felt ‘dirty’ but soon got used to it until one day she found that she was pregnant.

What about her ‘boards’? What about her parents? What if everyone found out? How about her school?

The next morning, she was found hanging from the ceiling fan of her room.

This post is written as an entry for Day 1 of the Bar-A-Thon Edition 3. The prompt that I am using for my posts is the marathon of 100 word stories combined with the prompt for today which is ‘one too many’.

Open 24 Hours

Ronit entered the pub named Open 24 Hours, with his group of friends. They were all there to celebrate Mohit’s birthday. They ordered their drinks and went to the dance floor. After a couple of hours, Ronit went to the washroom, when he came out of the washroom, his eyes caught a girl outside the girl’s washroom, holding her high-heeled sandals in one of her hands. She was trying to make a call but was facing some network issues. She looked worried.

Ronit went to her and asked, “Would you like to use my phone? I might be a stranger to you but if you don’t mind you can use my phone. You can delete the number from the caller’s list if you want.

Hesitatingly, she took the phone and dialled a number.

“Mom, the party is going to be over soon. I will be back in an hour. Don’t worry about me. I am fine. Bye.”

She gave the phone back to him.

“My name is Raima. I am here with my friends. I was trying to call my mom to tell her that I am okay. Thanks for the help.” She said in a friendly voice.

“I am Ronit. That’s okay. I am here with my friends too. Are you going inside?”

“No, I want to stay outside for a while. Do you mind joining me?” Raima asked him.

“Umm, okay,” Ronit replied.

Just then Raima’s phone rang and she answered. She told him that it was her friend who was looking for her and asking to go home. She excused herself and went towards the exit door.

After a while, Ronit went inside and joined his friends who were still on the dance floor.

The next day, Ronit was sitting in his office but was not able to focus on his work. His thoughts were still occupied by the events of last night. He wasn’t able to get Raima out of his mind. Maybe it was love at first sight!

The week spent as usual in his office. The following weekend he thought of visiting the pub again. He spoke to his friends and they decided to go to the same pub again.

Ronit was hoping to see Raima again there. His eyes were looking for her while his friends were enjoying themselves on the floor. Feeling restless he went out to the terrace where they had met last weekend. Luckily, he spotted her. She was standing with her back towards him. Initially, he thought that she might be someone else. As he moved further, he was sure she was Raima.

“Hi, so we meet again!” Ronit called out to her.

Raima was startled to see him but greeted him with a smile.

“Ya, this is one of our favourites. We come here every weekend. What about you?” Ronit told her.

“I come here often too. My friend brings me here. Though I don’t like it much. It is only because of my friend that I come here. Her parents won’t let her come otherwise.”

They spoke to each other for some time after which she said, “Ronit, can I ask you for a favour. It’s getting too late and my mom is waiting for me at home. I will tell my friends that I am going home. They won’t mind.”

They left the pub in Ronit’s car. She told him that her father had expired many years back and she was the only child of her parents. She and her mother lived in an apartment nearby.

Ronit dropped Raima outside her apartments. She gave him her number and told him which apartment she lived in. Ronit thought that she liked him too.

Two days later, Ronit was passing by the same apartments. He thought of going to her house and meeting her. Maybe he would be able to meet her.

He rang the bell of her house. A woman opened the door.

“Hello, aunty. Is Raima there? I am her friend. I would like to meet her.” Ronit asked the woman with a smile.

“Raima?” asked the woman surprisingly.

“Come inside.” She said.

In the drawing-room, there was a big picture of Raima with a garland.

Ronit was shocked. Before he could speak, the woman spoke to him, “that’s my daughter, Raima. She died last year in an accident. Her body was found outside the Pub called Open 24 Hours. She had gone there with her friends. They say that she fell down from the terrace being highly drunk. But I know she wasn’t drunk that night. She had called me just before the time of her death to tell me that she was fine and will be back in an hour for the party was about to get over. I still don’t know what happened that night.” Raima’s mother told him.

Ronit did not know what to think or to say. The memories of those two nights…the call that she made on his phone… I will be back in an hour… the party is about to get over…I am fine…

Ronit left the place without saying anything.

He sat in the car and started not knowing where he was going.

“Hi Ronit, looking for me?”

Ronit looked on his left and saw Raima sitting in the car. Suddenly, he lost the control of the steering wheel.

The crowd gathered and policemen arrived outside Open 24 Hours and took out the body of Ronit from the car.

This post is written as an enrty for Day 7 of the Write Tribe Festival of Words June 2018.

The prompt which I have used today is the picture prompt used in the featured image of the post.

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The Wedding Vows

The wedding ceremonies of Avinash and Avantika were taking place. Past midnight, everyone assembled at the pavilion for the saatphere (the wedding vows). Their friends and relatives were cracking jokes, their parents tired but happy since everything was going well. The seventh phera was about to start when suddenly Avinash’s father got a stroke and fainted.

“Dad!” Avinash and his sisters cried together. The garland and turban flew in the air as he ran to help his father. They immediately took his father in a car and rushed to the hospital.

The shock made Avantika’s mother faint. Avinash’s father was critical. His sisters declared that they would not bring the bride home without their father.

At the pavilion, Avantika refused to move from her place by saying, she will not leave the place without Avinash…

This post is written for Day 4 of the Write Tribe Festival of Words June 2018.

#flashfiction #writebravely #photoprompt

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Your Name is Destiny, For Destiny is in Your Own Hands

“Our fate lives within us. You only have to be brave enough to see it.” – Brave
“Ma, see my appointment letter. They have appointed me as the customer care manager in the hotel. It’s all because of you ma.” Mrs Shekhawat was patiently listening to Niyati who was ranting about her interview details.
It was the same Niyati whom she had met fifteen years back in the village of Orissa where she was working as a social activist for the cause of poor and uneducated children. Mrs Shekhawat had very tough time in persuading her father to send her to the school established by her.
Little Niyati would often come to the school in her father’s absence. She knew what her father would do to her when he came to know about her escapades.
Once when Niyati did not come to school for many days, she went to her house to ask about her. Niyati’s father fought with her and asked her to go away. But she could not leave after she saw the sick and feeble Niyati. She almost looked half dead.

“Ma, ma! What are you thinking? Ma, I want to tell you something,” Mrs Shekhawat’s stream of thoughts was suddenly broken.

“Adi has proposed me Ma!” she paused for a while.
“That’s great Niyati. What did you say?” asked Mrs Shekhawat.

“I don’t know, ma. I don’t want to marry yet. Rather, I don’t want to marry ever.”

“Niyati, this could not be you. From when did you start saying no to life? You have always been a fighter. How can you say no when happiness is ready to embrace you? Past is dead and gone. You are the creator of your own destiny.”

“No, ma…it was all because of you.”
“No, Niyati. It was you. You yourself chose to come out of those miseries. Now, go ahead and embrace love and life with the same spirit. Create your own destiny now as you did then. Remember how you would come to the school despite the warnings of your father.”
The memory of that day was still fresh in her mind. Mrs Shekhawat had come to her house to ask for her. Her father had fought with her. Niyati gathered all her strength to go and meet her. For she knew, it was her last chance. She was barely able to walk after the cruelty of her father. Her father had come to know that she went to Mrs Shekhawat’s school in his absence. He had not only beaten her up with sticks but also forced himself upon her at night to teach her a lesson. Her mother had no courage to say anything in front of his father.
Niyati had clung to Mrs Shekhawat and cried her heart out. She told her about all her miseries and pleaded her to take her along.
Mrs Shekhawat paid five thousand rupees to her father and bought her freedom.

This post is written as Day 3 entry for the Write Tribe Festival of Words June 2018.

#writebravely

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Super Healthy Recipe for the Super Speedy Recovery of a Sick Toddler

One of the cutest and adorable stage of childhood is the toddler stage. However, even the cutest toddler throws the most difficult tantrum to handle. It is at this stage that the children are developing food habits. They start showing up their likes and dislikes. Children become fussy eaters also. Children become fussy eaters also at this stage. The most difficult and dreaded part comes when they fall sick and refuse to eat anything.

I used to feel like pulling my hair and crying when they would fall ill and would not allow even a single bite to go down their tummies. A slight push and you will find yourself mopping the floor with all the food that had gone into the little tummies with so much struggle. The challenge is to be patient at this time.

After researching a lot, I found one super food that works like magic potion during such days and that is quinoa.
Quinoa is a super food and has many benefits. It is easily digestible and has many health benefits. It is tasty, crunchy and can be cooked in a variety of ways. Here are some of its benefits:
1. It is high in vitamin A, C, and E.
2. It is high in magnesium, potassium, and calcium.
3. It has 8 essential amino acids.
4. It is an excellent source of iron.
5. It is rich in protein.

Quinoa is a great option for parents who have a tough time feeding their kids with healthy food. It can be cooked like rice and served with curries and gravies.

A simple way of giving it to a toddler is in the form of khichdi.

Quinoa Khichdi
Ingredients:
¼ cup – quinoa
½ cup – moong dal
2 cup – water
Salt- to taste
¼ cup – finely chopped vegetables like peas, beans, carrots, cauliflower etc.
1 tbsp – Ghee
¼ tsp – turmeric
¼ tsp – cumin seeds

Method:
1. Rinse quinoa several times to remove its bitterness.
2. Rinse moong dal 3-4 times.
3. Soak quinoa and moong dal for 30 minutes.
4. In a pressure cooker, put ghee and let it heat.
5. Add cumin seeds, and let it splutter.
6. Add chopped vegetables and sauté them.
7. Add quinoa, moong dal and water. Add salt and turmeric.
8. Close the pressure cooker and allow it to whistle.
9. After about 1-2 whistles, remove from gas and allow it to cool.
10. Before serving, add a spoon full of ghee or butter.

I find this recipe especially useful when my kids fall ill and are unable to eat much. Quinoa khichdi is easy to chew and digest. With the benefits of quinoa, it helps in their speedy recovery also.

This blog post is a part of #Baby_ToddlerFood Blog Train hosted by Anisha from Momzdiary, Deepali from Myteenytot and Danisha from Lovethatyoucanbuy

We 40 Mom Bloggers would love to pour some Baby & Toddler Food Ideas just for you.
This is a month – long blog train. Stay tuned and Enjoy.

Lastly I would like to thank Ankita from caringmommadiaries for introducing me and would love to invite Sobha to hop on this train and share her recipe.